GGH Blog

Moving on After Facing Disappointment

The dreaded D word is one that we all wince to when we hear that come up in conversation from a loved one expressing their feelings about our actions. Sometimes our disappointment isn’t always directed at a person, it could be toward something we saw going much differently. Can we move on after loss and disappointment? The short answer to that is, it’s complicated.

Disappointment comes in all varieties especially as you’re moving through adulthood. Visions you once had for yourself become altered and paths become rerouted. It’s important for us to process our losses in order to move forward. Moving forward doesn’t mean erasing, it means allowing space for more life to be lived. Some of us move through life with unprocessed losses and feelings of disappointment which seep into our relationships especially the one we have with ourselves.

Disappointment in Relationships

  • Relationships progressive or abruptly ending
  • Friends not showing up in the way you need
  • Dynamics and priorities shifting within relationships
  • Grieving or going through a life transition and not having the support needed

All revolve around needs no longer being met, growing pains or a breakdown in communication.

Disappointment in Career Path

  • Job and atmosphere not being what you imagined
  • Feeling like a sector of the job isn’t for you
  • Feeling like you’ve put in years and are ready to make a shift

Reframing these situations is an opportunity to redirect our attention elsewhere even if that means feeling a little lost for a while. It is essential to our wellbeing to work towards self compassion rather than staying stuck in feelings around failing at something we committed to or having let down others in our lives if we voice that this isn’t for us. Naturally, we very well may feel this way initially. Our actions impact others and when it comes to a career shift, this can impact your partner or family. This is a large weight to carry. We’re often faced with this difficult decision of choosing a new path that aligns to our authentic self or pushing through while accepting that it might not be the best opportunity to make a change in this moment. Only we can make the best choice for ourselves with the information and feelings that we have.

Processing Disappointment 

  • Take accountability where needed – reflect and see where you need to do work to better yourself
  • Build awareness and acceptance for what was out of your control
  • Self validation that change is okay, we’re allowed to change our minds and reroute as much as the next person
  • Hurt feelings whether its our own or the people around us is sometimes inevitable but what we can control is our communication, compassion and boundaries around it
  • Embrace the tears and moving through your emotions, change is hard
  • Lean on people who are able to give you space to share and offer support
  • Give yourself time to heal and refocus, do not go down the comparison hole, this is your journey
  • There is a period of grief in leaving something behind that you have planted roots in and saw a future in whether that’s a romantic connection or job
  • Working through feelings around letting go which can be hard if you truly didn’t ever see it ending
  • Take time to reconnect with yourself
  • What we perceive as a setback may be the redirection that we’ve been needing

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